Growing up, I always knew my dad had an important job. As a city manager, he was responsible for helping communities function, solving complex problems, and supporting elected officials and staff in delivering the services residents rely on every day. To my friends, it was an unfamiliar title. To me, it simply meant someone who kept a community running smoothly.

What I didn’t fully understand as a child was how deliberately he balanced that responsibility with something even more important: being a husband and father.

My father has spent nearly 30 years in local government, serving communities in Georgia, Florida, California, and Utah. Despite the demands of the profession, he has always been fully present for his family. As the family grew, he regularly attended school programs and concerts, coached sports leagues, joined us for school lunches on Thursdays because they always served a Thanksgiving-style meal he loved, and made time for adventures that created lasting memories.

Just as important, when he came home at the end of the day, the challenges of the office stayed there. We did not hear about political conflict, budget pressures, or personnel issues. Instead, we experienced his presence, consistency, and the clear message that while his work mattered deeply, his family mattered even more.

At the same time, he never separated us from the meaning of public service. He brought us to council meetings so we could see local democracy in action and encouraged us to volunteer at community events. One of my first jobs was helping clean the town hall building while he served as city manager of Santa Clara, Utah. It was a simple task, but it taught me about taking pride in public spaces and having respect for those who serve behind the scenes. Through these experiences, we learned that exceptional service is not about title or recognition; it is about care, commitment, and community.

Today, nearly three decades into his career, my father continues to serve in local government as the city manager of Heber City, Utah. Somehow, I have followed in his footsteps, working in local government as the assistant town manager for Colonial Beach, Virginia. Now married and beginning to build my own family, I face many of the same challenges he did: long hours, competing priorities, and the constant pull between professional responsibility and personal presence.

The difference now is perspective. As someone in the profession, I have the greatest mentor I could ask for—someone who has truly been there and done that. I am grateful for the opportunity to discuss challenges, make decisions, and work through moments of uncertainty with someone who understands the job at its core. I also hope, perhaps for his sake as much as mine, that he finds it as rewarding as I do to share experiences and reflect on the similarities in the challenges we each face.

Now, sitting on the other side of the table, I better understand the discipline it takes to give your best at work while remaining fully present at home. My father’s example reminds me that exceptional service to a community does not require sacrificing family. Caring for your family strengthens your ability to lead, grounds decision-making, sharpens perspective, and reinforces why public service matters in the first place.

As local government professionals, we pride ourselves on dedication, resilience, and service. Those qualities are essential. But so is remembering to step away, be present, and invest in the people who support us. Because long after the meetings end and the office lights are turned off, it is our families who remain, and they are ultimately our most important responsibility.

KYLER J. BROWER is assistant town manager of Colonial Beach, Virginia.